Comparitave Study of the Potential Annoyance Levels of Cows, Pigs and Goats

Cows:

On the plus side: Cow lowing is lower pitch. If mooing is long and low enough, its almost relaxing.

On the down side: Mooing is never long and low enough to be relaxing. Cows don't moo to talk about how content they are. Moos are almost always tinged in panic or anger, and at a decibel range that is impossible to block out.

Average time of annoyance: All day, but most commonly between 3-5 in the morning

Annoyance level: High

Pigs:

On the plus side: There is no plus side. They don't even taste good.

On the down side: The only thing worse than the noise pigs make is how they smell. The only thing worse than how pigs smell is the noise they make. They smell like garbage and port a potties and they sound like people trapped in Dantes Inferno.

Average time of annoyance: Smell=Constant. Noise= In the middle of your darkest nightmares.

Annoyance level: Unseemly

Goats:

On the plus side: They are few and far between

On the down side: Because they're not common, when one sneaks up behind you and starts bleating, you will jump a minimum of 6 inches

Average time of annoyance: Whenever you least expect it

Annoyance level: Hair raising

A steady, unrelenting rain:

On the plus side: Keeps the day cool and the dust out of the air. If theres nothing to do, gives you an excuse to stay reading in bed as long as you want

On the down side: Almost never rains on the days you have nothing to do. Almost always pours on the days you have lots of things in lots of different places to do (all of which require walking down muddy roads). Keeps the air too cold to be able to comfortably take a cold water shower, even in the middle of the afternoon. Makes you have to choose between getting wet and keeping sane by seeing other people. If rain is steady, means you'll hear the same noise all day for days on end. Impossible to block out, it quickly becomes a sound that triggers feelings of cabin fever.

Average time of annoyance: Unrelenting

Annoyance level: Oh thank god its raining for the first two weeks of rainy season. Oh my god its still raining??? From June-December